Always With Me
by OnTheTardis
Summary: The Doctor thinks about Donna. Spoilers: nothing really besides Journey's End.


**I dedicate this short story to my sister, Ashley (Vampmistress777 as she was known here); she past away last month at the hospital. I wasn't there, she had told me to leave and an hour later my mom called to tell me Ash was gone. I have tried again and again to think of something to remember her by, and then it struck me to write this. It will be the last of our 'quotation series'. So, Sis, this is for you.**

**I do not own Doctor Who**

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_Looking back, I have this to regret, that too often when I loved, I did not say so._

_ ~David Grayson~_

The Doctor was brilliant, amazing, courageous, unique, and sometimes a downright fool.

For being the last Time Lord in existence he surely didn't have a grasp on how quickly time went.

The saying that what's here today is mostly likely gone tomorrow had been a staple motto for the Doctor for most of his life. And yet, he could not stop his inane pattern of not exposing himself for who he really was.

He tried to appear calm and collected, steering away from the matters of the heart(s), and focused solely on the underlying non-domestic life he was use to.

His companions came and went like the turn of the tide, and only a handful of them managed to work their way in and refused to leave; he didn't mind that, he loved the company.

Beat being alone.

But, then there were the ones that simply had to figure out what made the man from Gallifrey tick. Wondering just how intricate his hearts really were and if there was enough room for them to perhaps show him how foolishly they loved.

Humans love unconditionally and sometimes without reason. They see to it that love is the one thing they hang onto when everything else grows dim.

He loved them, in his own way, which was bordering the same reckless abandon his companions had.

And just like a fool, he had to love one in return; of course he did, at first resist her and tried to keep a clear head. But, she was unlike the friends he had had in the past, so much braver than him and more aware of how the universe worked.

Donna was the kind of person that saw to it that he was alright at the end of the day and would push him to confess if he didn't feel like talking.

She had a knack for that, and he would smile at the mere thought of her.

How could he not love her?

And how could he tell her without breaking down the sturdy friendship they had built?

So, acting as he always did, he kept his mouth shut. Hoping that sometime along the way the opportunity would present itself and he would tell her. Tell her how wonderful she was and how she made him acknowledge that sometimes it was okay to not be 'alright' all the time.

However, the universe had other plans for them, and before the Doctor could tell her how much she was to him; she was gone.

Never before had the Doctor wished that he could just cross his timeline and tell Donna everything, even if he could not keep her, the fact that his emotions were once again unsaid hurt the most.

He had every chance, all the time at his finger tips, but he had been stubborn and naïve.

Donna had slipped through his fingers; their time together had been brief, but unforgettable. Her memories may be gone, but his isn't.

He will always remember her charm, the eagerness she had within her, the glow from her stalwart brilliance. The way her heart went out to those she had just met, and the fact that she never let anything stand in her way.

The Doctor would remember, how he had so many chances to tell her how he felt, and how he had remained silent. Knowing that he would keep her with him always, and whenever he did something he would think 'what would she do?' before he reacted.

He smiled, thoughtfully, yes that version of Donna was gone, but was still alive within him; she, of course, had been the one that refused to leave in the first place.


End file.
